Courage doesnt always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says :"I'll try again tomorrow'"
This is totally where I am at - and today I woke up willing to try again. Never have asked God for more grace - and amazingly enough its there - on tap - and here I am blogging at 18h50... Ella is down and peace reigns in my home. Today I went to the Thursday leaders meeting and managed with some logistical gymnastics to get Ella sorted for a few hours with mum, I also cooked 2 meals - one for our neighbour whos wife is in hospital and the other for Steve. AND I am mostly stoked because Ella drank AND ate today. She also screamed for over 45 mins when I tried to put her down at mid day but I won the battle eventually and besides I dont care - she got life giving nourishment in her gut! I dont have a 5.5 month old anoerexic afterall.
We also got electric fencing - on the one hand GREAT - because I now feel much safer alone with Ella at home but at the same time SAD - reality check - I live in SA - there is massive crime and I have to put fort knox measures in place not to be a victim - again.
You can not see it in this pic - but here is princess with rice cereal and apple all over her face, bib, feet...eveywhere. She ate more off her plastic bib I think...
And this rather arb pic (taken with the last teeny weeny bit of battery life in the camera) - represents my best time in the whole day - when Steve comes home! (and as usual Bruno has to have a piece of the action). Yay yay yay. He loves bonding with Ella in the last of her waking hours...love it. Love him. Love her.
Gotta dash - going to have dinner with my old house mates...life feels strangely normal!
1 comment:
Hooray for better days. They always seem to come just when you think you cant go any further....am seriously impressed that you made dinner for Steve even though you are going out with your old housemates. 10 points for you.
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